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Fostering
Self-Esteem
How can you, as a
Big Brother or Big Sister, help raise self-esteem in your Little? The
following four conditions that affect self-esteem can be utilized by Bigs
to assist Littles in developing self-esteem.
Connectedness:
Being a part of a family, community, and being in touch with self, personal
history and culture enhances self-esteem.
- Share your interests,
hobbies, and appropriate life concerns.
- Do something special
for your Little that meets his/her needs.
- Encourage participation
in cultural programs and community service.
Uniqueness:
Developing a special sense of self and recognizing uniqueness is important
for self-esteem. A young person may be unique in appearance, talents,
vocational interests, hobbies or interests.
- Notice and affirm
special characteristics.
- Ask your Little
to teach you how to do something s/he can do.
- Encourage your
Little to express ideas, even if they are different from yours.
- Ask your Little
to use his/her special talents or interests to benefit others.
Power: Having
the resources, opportunities and capabilities to control one's own life
enhances self-esteem. Young people are empowered when they are taught
to make decisions, set personal limits, take responsibility, solve problems,
and teach others.
- Encourage personal
responsibility - being responsible for what you feel, think and do.
- Help your Little
become aware of his/her own decision making process.
- Take your Little
through the steps of problem solving.
- Encourage your
Little to set goals - short and long term.
- Set standards for
achievement, but allow for mistakes!
- Emphasize strengths
not weaknesses.
Models: Good
role models can affect self-esteem. Models serve as examples to help young
people establish their own values, goals, ideals and personal standards.
Being in contact with someone that you admire can make you feel good about
yourself.
- Expose your Little
to people you admire.
- Help your Little
think through what is important to him/her.
- Help your Little
face the consequences of his/her behavior.
- Spend time teaching
the how and why of tasks that your Little hasn't learned yet.
- Share your own
values, goals, ideals and personal standards. You don't have to require
your Little change his or her own values or agree with yours in order
to model a different approach to life. Children often respond much more
positively when values are presented to them with the expectation that
they will choose what is right for them, rather than just blindly agree.
- Encourage open
and thoughtful discussions around values, beliefs and interests.
Other
resources for Bigs:
Youth
Services
32 Walnut Street
PO Box 6008
Brattleboro, VT 05302
Phone: (802) 257-0361
Fax: (802) 257-2171
Email: info@youthservicesinc.org
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